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.Had to feel my dick straining toward his own.My hands were at his shoulders, stroking, almost urging him on.I wanted him to deepen the kiss, I wanted to draw out the moment forever so I didn’t have to deal with the consequences of what it meant.Kane reluctantly drew himself back.Our legs were still touching, and we were very close, but not nearly close enough.He looked at me, the faintest frown cutting his brow.It looked.incredulous.“You didn’t stop me.”His chest expanded, as if he held his breath waiting for my answer.But what was my answer to that?“I.I.”All I could think about was his lips, shiny and a bit raw from our kiss.I wanted to lick them, slam our mouths together, and do it all over again.But it was all so.sudden, and—“I.I.just need to think.” And obviously, I couldn’t do that around him.I shimmied off the desk so we were jammed together.My breath came shallow as my hand slipped to his chest, ready to curl my hands into his T-shirt and haul him in again.I pushed him back and he didn’t resist.I’d come here to get answers about why Kane hadn’t told me he was DJ Dangerfield, but now I didn’t think I could handle the truth.Just.not right now.I hadn’t expected the kiss and it threw me.Even as I wanted it again, I hated it for the guilt it brought with it.“I thought I wanted to know, but I.” I shook my head and stumbled around the table to distance myself from him.“That came out of the blue.”“Shit, Justin, wait—”I shook my head at him, slowly backing to the door.I’d come to be angry with him.Angry he’d been the reason why Hannah and I had ultimately broken up.But now it wasn’t anger I was feeling, and I couldn’t process it.When it looked like he might follow, I held up my hand, stopping him.“I just can’t do this, this second.”Chapter SixKane texted me a couple of times over the next two days.He didn’t apologize for the kiss, but he did say it probably wasn’t the best way to start his explanation.He wanted to know if we could talk again, with emphasis on talk.He wanted to tell me why he hadn’t told me he was DJ Dangerfield.I sent him a one-word text: soon.Because who was I kidding? I hadn’t stopped thinking of the kiss since it happened, and while there was confusion and guilt, there was a bucket load more lust that went with it.On Thursday, Tom came to tutor me.This time he wore plain slacks and a striped T-shirt, and I thought we’d have a safely boring hour until he cranked out a monologue from The Republic.Could I laugh?“Right,” he said once he was done, “at the very least I’ve cheered you up.”My smile dropped and I ducked my head towards my notes.“So, my debate is next week.Do you think I’m ready for it?”Tom took the cue cards Kane had given me.He flipped through them.“He’s a bloody anxious wreck, you know.”My gaze snapped to his, but he looked back to the cue cards.“Did you know he’s talked about you all year? He’s always lounging about with his feet up on his desk, staring into space as he talks about all the conversations you had.Every week like clockwork.It was always Justin this, Justin that.‘I wonder who he is? I wonder if we could get along in real life’.”I sat up straighter in my chair; Tom’s descriptions sounded an awful lot like my own experience.I’d wondered the same sorts of things to my flatmate Todd or to Hannah.“You know we mostly fought on air, don’t you?” I said, even as my stomach flipped.Tom rolled his eyes.“I listened to that show more times than I care to admit just to check you two out for myself.You weren’t fighting.”I shut my notebook, itchy to be doing something with myself, so I could deal with the nervous crunching in my stomach.“Yes, we were.”Tom tossed the cue cards onto the table.“You’ll be ready for your test.But don’t kid yourself, Justin.You weren’t fighting, you were flirting, and I can assure you anyone who listened to that show would tell you the same.”“But I.” Suddenly another more pressing thought occurred to me.“Did you know who I was?”The audible swallow he gave told me he did, as did the way he glanced to the side.“Since when?”“From the beginning, okay?”“But.how?”Tom picked up the cue cards, stacking them neatly.“Marc takes care of tutor requests and I’d told him I wanted some more work.I was looking over his shoulder as he was assigning tutors to students and I saw the name Justin Jones.I really didn’t think it would be Kane’s ‘Justin’.But since I hear Kane always going on about ‘Justin’ the name stuck out, you know, so I said I wanted you.”“Well what a coincidence,” I said.It was almost too much for my skeptical mind to believe.“That’s what I thought.But even as I thought that, I still wondered ‘what if?’ And so, when we met that first time—”I clicked.“You did that ‘introductory session’ where we shared things we liked and didn’t.You slipped in you hated Tepid Creek and listened to 91.3 FM!”How completely conniving, creative, and clever.It was so.Tom.“So I figured you were him.The Justin.It was the best coincidence of the year.And then I got carried away.” His cheeks bloomed with color and he ran a hand through his fringe, looking at it as he continued, “You thought I was dressing as Plato that one session, but actually I was rather thinking I was cupid.”I laughed.“Cupid?”He dropped his fringe and folded his arms.“I wanted to make sure you were good enough for him
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